The Smile of God

I was not the perfect mother!

Have I fooled you into thinking that I was? O no, I hope not!

Motherhood was a growing experience for me. I was handicapped in the beginning. I did not grow up in a home full of love and godliness. In fact, a lot of the time it was full of godlessness. I do not blame my parents, they did not know what to do. But wife and motherhood was something I had to grow into, and I feel that I continue to grow in those areas.

I had dreamed of being a mother since I was a very young girl. I wanted a big family, one that reflected the love and morals and grace of the Little House books by Laura Ingalls Wilder. That was my biggest dream! I didn't know how to do it, but I was after it!

A godly woman who is wife and mother is a builder.

She takes that of which she has and uses it as she labors to bring about good things in her home.

She is not perfect, but she reaches out, standing on tip-toe at times, to the One who is perfection. She leans heavily on Him for strength, wisdom, patience, grace, love, etc. and when He pours those attributes into her, she pours it out on her family.

I had a friend one time who grew up in a perfect home. There were never cross words between parents. The children always respected their parents and followed their instruction. Life was perfect or was imperfection present, but hidden well? Later she learned that her parents had disagreements, just never in front of the children.

Nobody is perfect.

Life is not perfect. Sometimes it is downright harsh and even hostile.

My friend grew up and married the man she loved. She was expecting a Leave it To Beaver kind of experience like her parents had demonstrated. Her marriage was extreme culture shock. Their love was tested and tried on every side and imperfection could no longer be squelched. It was all out there in plain sight for everyone to see. It was a painful learning experience for my friend. Sadly, their marriage did not survive it.

Later she said with despair to me, "Why didn't my parents make life more real to me and show me that it wasn't always easy? I would have benefitted from seeing my parents work out a disagreement once in awhile. They made it look so easy and as a result, my expectations were way too high."

I learned a lot from my friend's experience. We didn't pretend to be perfect. I learned that we grow in seasons of adversity. It is good for our children to see us strive for excellence but it is also good for them to see us overcome. In time they will learn how to be overcomers.

I was not the perfect mom, just ask my children. They will testify that I made more mistakes than all of us put together. I think that they will tell you it was not perfection that stood out in our home, it was love. When there was conflict we worked it out. We majored in saying "I am sorry" when it was appropriate, and "I love you" every day. And then we prayed it through.

How does God access perfection? I believe He sees perfection when He sees a heart that is one hundred-per-cent devoted to Him. One that strives to please Him, and runs to Him as soon as they realize they have fallen short. Love covers a multitude of sins. Praise God! Love and mercy,those were the materials our home was built of. The Lord has faithfully blessed our efforts. We sense the smile of God.

"The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1

***The house pictured belongs to a friend of mine. It is one of my favorite houses in our town.